Friday, January 3, 2014

"I have a great need for Christ, and I have a great Christ for my need"


People have been asking me how I am the entire Impact conference and even after conference. Actually people have been asking me how I am all of my life. Lol! If you greet someone, usually the first thing they say is “how are you?” My typical response is to say, “I’m okay” or “I’m good.” It’s as if that is the only response I could give, because any other response would be facing the pain inside or the weaknesses that I had not yet come to terms with.

TRUTH IS….. I’m NOT okay.  I am B R O K E N.

My entire life I have felt like I had to be strong. I have felt like I had to hold everything in and be happy. I didn’t want to burden others with my problems or a DEEPER issue… I didn’t want to face them myself. During conference, I broke down probably 10 different times. I didn’t know why most of this was happening, but I definitely know why now. It was God breaking me. For so long I felt the need to “have it all together.” As a believer and often times as a leader, there is so much pressure to have all of your ducks in a row. This pressure is nothing new to me; this pressure has actually been present all of my life. Growing up in a home where it is expected for me to make straight As and have everything in line, I hadn’t really come to terms with failure or the idea of messing up. I knew in my head that we all mess up, but I wasn’t living that way. No matter how broken I may have felt, I would always put a smile on and cover it up. The words, “I’m good” had become an automatic response to the point that I didn’t even think of how I really felt within. I was preaching the Gospel to others. Telling them how broken and messed up we are and how much we need a savior, but I was living a life that said “I have it all together and don’t need a savior.” It was HEAD knowledge to me, but not HEART knowledge. I recognized that my God is holy, powerful, great, worthy, etc… but I wasn’t acknowledging my weaknesses….my sin.

“For all have sinned and FALL short of they glory of God.” –Romans 3:23

Did you catch that? FALL. We cannot miss this. This is HUGE! Fall is the present tense. This means it is currently happening. Sometimes in our minds we change it to FELL. We think that we only need a savior to be saved. But the truth is that we need a savior each and every day for the rest of our lives. We don’t just become a believer and have it all together. It’s a PROCESS- One that won’t be complete until Jesus returns (Phillippians 1:6). Are we really okay with not being okay? Are we REALLY okay with not being in control of our growth? Are we really okay with the fact that WE AREN’T GOD?

God revealed to me that by me not being open and transparent about my faults, in a sense I was trying to be God. I was trying to grow myself. Sure, I would share my struggles with others about things that God has freed me from. But I would share as if I wasn’t going through it now… I am free! But just because I am free from it, doesn’t mean I don’t still struggle.

Right now I am broken. I placed so much hope in my relationship with my boyfriend that I took my eyes off God, my boyfriend and I just broke up, I struggle with insecurity, sometimes I have so much pride and cannot admit when I need help… BUT YOU KNOW WHAT??

I can boast in my weaknesses because Christ’s power is magnified in that! People can see what God is doing in me when I’m open and that brings God glory. It may not feel good to me because it makes me vulnerable. But as long as it brings glory to God, that’s all that matters!  I am needy! I need Jesus every second and minute of the day. And right now I am right where God wants me to be. “It’s okay to not be okay, but it’s not okay to stay that way.” Wise words from Pastor Jerome Gay.

I encourage you all to really evaluate where you are. Not where you want to be, but where you are. Be honest with yourself! You are freed up to be honest because of what Jesus did! Jesus died on the cross for our past, present, and future sins. There is no guilt, shame, or condemnation in Christ. We don’t have to worry about what people think because of what Christ did on the cross.

1 John 8-9 says, “If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”

To confess means to “say the same thing as.” When we confess we are agreeing with God that we have sinned and that it is sin. But you can be encouraged that He is faithful to cleanse us! Confession is an opportunity to be cleansed. This whole walk with God is a sanctification (cleansing) process. God is faithful to forgive and to cleanse! Trust Him friends!


Love, 

Mazie Jasper

Sunday, June 16, 2013

Our NEED for God, His COMPASSION for us...

So I arrived in Raleigh at the hotel that we are set to stay in for the next month. Bags in hand and suitcase on the cart. I walked into the place that would hold many memories, tears, fellowship, laughs, devotions, and much more....ALREADY.  Never would I have ever expected within just this first week that the Lord would have wrecked me so much. BUT HE HAS. Learning and experiencing more of how Holy God is and how sinful I can be. It HURTS. I'm not going to say that everything feels good. I've been so convicted. I've learned that I like be in control and have everything work a certain way and smoothly. It bugs me when things don't go as planned. I also worry a lot about what others have to say about me. I want to do things the way others would want. I have a hard time saying no. I over think way more than I should. I tend to be a little self-righteous at times. I don't know how to manage money well. I could go on and on! But there is no need, because I can't fix ANY of these things. ONLY GOD CAN! Brothers and sisters when we recognize how sinful we are, we recognize how much we NEED God. WE CAN'T DO ANYTHING IN OUR OWN STRENGTH. We can't make ourselves Holy and righteous, only GOD can. Let me tell you something SO GREAT! Our awesome loving God meets us right WHERE WE ARE. In the story of the Prodigal's son in Luke 15 starting at verse 11, the younger son asks his father for his share of the estate. The father gives him the money. Not even a few days later the son gets up and goes to a far off country and spends ALL of the money. Not some, but ALL! A famine strikes and he has nothing left. He tries to fix the situation and get a job feeding swine. He was so hungry. He was so desperate he wanted to eat what the pigs were eating. But no one would even give him that. He finally came to his senses, as it says in the Word, and realized that his father had more than enough food to feed him and everyone else. He was too scared to go home at first because he had shame. In those times, the jews would smash pots in front of you and wouldn't let you come back to the city. That was their way of saying they didn't want your mess in their city. He was scared. But he came back anyway. When he was far off from home, the father saw him and RAN towards him. Now wouldn't you think that if you spent all of the money your dad gave you, that he would scold you right? That he would be angry? NOPE! Not this Father! This father EMBRACED his son and even when the son said that he had sinned against the father and that he wasn't worthy to be called his son, the father proceeded to clothe him in the BEST robe with a ring and put sandals on his feet. Then he celebrated because the son came home! Y'all this is how God reacts when we come to Him. There is no CONDEMNATION in Christ. He is not scowling at you! He is smiling and happy that you are return to him. He DELIGHTS in us! He LOVES us! We tend to beat ourselves up when we mess up. We try to fix things ourselves. When a relationship isn't working out the way that we want it to, we try to do all of this stuff to make it work. When we mess up on our job, we tend to go the extra mile to PROVE that we are doing a good job. When we fail, we feel like a failure. Brothers and sisters you are NOT A FAILURE. You are a child of the KING! In all of our brokenness HE wants us to come to HIM! Lay everything at His feet! Let Him make you whole again! If we were perfect and had everything together we wouldn't need Christ. Focus on what Jesus did on the cross! He was beaten, mocked, scorned, bruised, condemned, etc... so we would not have to bound by our sin. We are FREE in JESUS! Lay all of your burdens, worries, stresses, etc.. at HIS feet! Let HIM embrace you! Let Him CHANGE you! Surrender ALL unto Him! He is WAITING with open arms and tons of compassion for you! Just one of the many things He is teaching me. Pray this encourages you. Praying for you and with you! Grace and peace be with you friends.









Thursday, May 30, 2013

First blog post

Hello everyone! I'm pretty new to this blog thing, but just wanted to post to try it out before Raleigh. I will be serving in Raleigh this summer and will be posting my experiences, what God teaches me, etc.. here. The purpose of this blog is so that God will be glorified! I don't care if you know my name, just as long as you know HIS! Love you friends! Grace and peace be with you!! -Mazie J.